“In an excerpt from ‘Writings from My Soul’, I wrote of the things I had learned about this same spot of ground in different seasons. Not surprisingly, I was intent on discovering whether God was interested in life and living, even when the environment had turned cold. In my mind, if there remained life in the middle of a harsh winter, there was hope for me:
Life Out of Death
(By Tina, Angel, etc. - 1992)
I trudge through
the newly fallen snow,
nearly a foot deep now.
I hope by following
the fresh tracks of my friends,
the deer,
to avoid tripping over
unseen rocks and branches.
The world looks white and beautiful,
but dead.
The sap no longer flows
through the arteries of the trees
or the veins of their green leaves.
Are they really dead
or do they merely sleep away
the harshness of winter?
It is cold today,
but I feel driven to hike
to the top of the mountain.
I must find out,
when the cold becomes so intense,
if the rest of the world
curls up and dies inside,
like me.
I approach where the water
used to trickle down the hill.
It was frozen on top
before,
but I could still hear the water
flowing under the ice.
Now there is a foot of snow
and I hear nothing.
I quickly trudge across the snow-filled stream
to the other side
where I know has lived
a beautiful patch of moss.
The forked tree is very crooked
and the unsightly bend
creates a sheltered hollow
perfect for moss.
I look carefully
and my heart fills with joy!
It lives,
still vibrant green,
still soft to the touch!
Even the snow has been held at bay
by the deformity
of the misshapen tree.
The life-giving water
is still another key.
I climb to the source,
and out of the frozen ground,
continually flowing,
springs forth water
creating still an unfrozen pool.
The water seems alive with strength.
Oh Lord,
within the caverns
of my tortured
and twisted
mind and heart,
let there be a sheltered place,
growing green
and pliable!
As I hike through cold snow
for an hour or two,
even in winter,
let me reach Thee
as I have searched now
and reached the source.
Strengthen me!
Help me!
Help me find
the pink skies
inside.
Don’t let the sage
completely overpower
the pinks and greens within.
Help me still find
beauty and life.
Help me remember
that moss is still green
and living
even in winter,
and that the water still flows
out of the frozen ground,
and that the sap will flow once again
through the arteries of the trees!
(By Tina, Angel, etc. - 1992)
I trudge through
the newly fallen snow,
nearly a foot deep now.
I hope by following
the fresh tracks of my friends,
the deer,
to avoid tripping over
unseen rocks and branches.
The world looks white and beautiful,
but dead.
The sap no longer flows
through the arteries of the trees
or the veins of their green leaves.
Are they really dead
or do they merely sleep away
the harshness of winter?
It is cold today,
but I feel driven to hike
to the top of the mountain.
I must find out,
when the cold becomes so intense,
if the rest of the world
curls up and dies inside,
like me.
I approach where the water
used to trickle down the hill.
It was frozen on top
before,
but I could still hear the water
flowing under the ice.
Now there is a foot of snow
and I hear nothing.
I quickly trudge across the snow-filled stream
to the other side
where I know has lived
a beautiful patch of moss.
The forked tree is very crooked
and the unsightly bend
creates a sheltered hollow
perfect for moss.
I look carefully
and my heart fills with joy!
It lives,
still vibrant green,
still soft to the touch!
Even the snow has been held at bay
by the deformity
of the misshapen tree.
The life-giving water
is still another key.
I climb to the source,
and out of the frozen ground,
continually flowing,
springs forth water
creating still an unfrozen pool.
The water seems alive with strength.
Oh Lord,
within the caverns
of my tortured
and twisted
mind and heart,
let there be a sheltered place,
growing green
and pliable!
As I hike through cold snow
for an hour or two,
even in winter,
let me reach Thee
as I have searched now
and reached the source.
Strengthen me!
Help me!
Help me find
the pink skies
inside.
Don’t let the sage
completely overpower
the pinks and greens within.
Help me still find
beauty and life.
Help me remember
that moss is still green
and living
even in winter,
and that the water still flows
out of the frozen ground,
and that the sap will flow once again
through the arteries of the trees!
Psalms 104: parts of verses 10-28 - "He sendeth the springs into the valleys, which run among the hills. They give drink to every beast of the field: . . . By them shall the fowls of the heaven have their habitation, which sing among the branches. He watereth the hills from His chambers: . . . The trees of the Lord are full of sap; . . . The high hills are a refuge . . . These wait all upon thee; . . . thou openest thine hand, they are filled with good.”
Isaiah 25:8 – “He will swallow up death in victory; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from off all faces . . .”
“God was certainly a part of my healing and His powerful hand was evident in so many ways. To many who have a distaste for "organized religion," there is often a sharp divide separating the God of personal experience, such as the God who taught me so directly and personally in the mountains near my home, from the God of the church. That wasn't my experience. I was blessed to have both. I was able to develop a deep connection with God in my personal life while also being an accepted member of a vibrant, living, God-filled church that worshipped a God with the same powerful and loving attributes as the God who created me.” (My Tears Fall Inside, pages 94-98)
Isaiah 25:8 – “He will swallow up death in victory; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from off all faces . . .”
“God was certainly a part of my healing and His powerful hand was evident in so many ways. To many who have a distaste for "organized religion," there is often a sharp divide separating the God of personal experience, such as the God who taught me so directly and personally in the mountains near my home, from the God of the church. That wasn't my experience. I was blessed to have both. I was able to develop a deep connection with God in my personal life while also being an accepted member of a vibrant, living, God-filled church that worshipped a God with the same powerful and loving attributes as the God who created me.” (My Tears Fall Inside, pages 94-98)
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