“I noticed one day that I had started doing something rather mindlessly with my hands when I walked into the hills. I would sit by a bush, pick up pieces of dead grass and wrap them with a piece of green grass. I would then place these tiny bundles on the ground. I never really thought about what I was doing or what it meant, but a part of me knew. Tina, one of my parts, later wrote about what it meant to her and that is when I understood:
DEAD GRASS
(By Tina - 1992)
I sit alone
in the hills
and break the dry grass
into even lengths.
I take my bundle of dead grass
and tie it tightly together.
I wrap it twice
with a piece of living green grass.
I take my small package
and set it carefully on the ground.
It is difficult to see.
It blends into the grass.
If you are walking in the hills
and you search carefully
you will see that I was here
hiding in the grass.
Someone please notice me
and see that I was hurt.
My pain hides well like the grass,
but still it hurts.
Some pain can hide for years and years,
like my dead grass.
I’ve tied it up tightly
And set it away.
But the pain is still there
wrapped in living flesh.
Please help me find
the dead grass.
Look carefully at my pain
and care that I got hurt.
Help me cry the pain away
so that what remains can live.”
(By Tina - 1992)
I sit alone
in the hills
and break the dry grass
into even lengths.
I take my bundle of dead grass
and tie it tightly together.
I wrap it twice
with a piece of living green grass.
I take my small package
and set it carefully on the ground.
It is difficult to see.
It blends into the grass.
If you are walking in the hills
and you search carefully
you will see that I was here
hiding in the grass.
Someone please notice me
and see that I was hurt.
My pain hides well like the grass,
but still it hurts.
Some pain can hide for years and years,
like my dead grass.
I’ve tied it up tightly
And set it away.
But the pain is still there
wrapped in living flesh.
Please help me find
the dead grass.
Look carefully at my pain
and care that I got hurt.
Help me cry the pain away
so that what remains can live.”
(My Tears Fall Inside, page 84 -85)
So many people keep their pain locked within, thinking it cannot hurt them there. Unfortunately, trapped inside, the pain hurts continually and never goes away until the tears are able to flow. Sometimes we can’t unlock that sadness until a loving, empathetic person reaches out to us. I am thankful for those who God enabled to see beyond my façade of being “fine” and reached out to me until I let them into my world.
So many people keep their pain locked within, thinking it cannot hurt them there. Unfortunately, trapped inside, the pain hurts continually and never goes away until the tears are able to flow. Sometimes we can’t unlock that sadness until a loving, empathetic person reaches out to us. I am thankful for those who God enabled to see beyond my façade of being “fine” and reached out to me until I let them into my world.
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